For the past couple of weeks we have been fighting with Hayden to go to sleep, which in some nights has resulted in a 10:00 bedtime....her usual bedtime is 8-8:30. Not only is she fighting bedtime, but she is waking up at 1:30-2:00 in the morning SCREAMING. Usually we let her cry it out but she is not crying it out. It is the kind of scream you think she is being beaten. We thought maybe night terrors? or ear infection? Whatever it is, she does not go back to sleep...which then wakes up Bubby...which is a totally different story. So, she ends up in our bed...Yes I know...that is NOT a good thing and we are starting a bad habit...don't judge us, just help us! In the 2 years she has been on this earth, she has NEVER slept in our bed with us. She would never go to sleep and it was just not a good thing. BUT now she snuggles in right with me and drifts off to Hayden dream-world. I can tell this because she ends up sideways in bed, kicking poor Nic in the head, ribs, back, anything that is in the way of her feet. She is constantly moving around and even ends up with her feet by my face and her head somewhere down at the other end of the bed. I try to then take her back to her bed but somehow she senses that and starts the screaming again.
I guess I just don't understand what is going on? My pro sleeper has turned into a...not pro sleeper. I know that kids go through phases and bla bla bla...but really? Just when we were getting Colton to sleep through Miss Thing starts where he left off.
So...any suggestions of what we can try? We can't keep this up. She is turning into a BIG mess and just needs her sleep.
4 comments:
Does she have a sleeping bag that she can sleep in when she comes to your room? You can try to explain to her that it will be her special spot she can come to when she needs it. You might also have her help you set it up, pick the spot, and place some favorite dolls there so she knows that they will be waiting for her.
I agree, Sam still comes into our room in the middle of the night, but now most nights i don't even notice. I made a little bed for her out of blankets and pillows on the floor and she goes straight there. Sometimes she'll ask if she can get into bed with me, but I tell her no, she has to sleep on the floor or go back to her bed and usually she picks the floor. So you can try that for a while. As for the screaming, I really don't know. I have no experience with that. I'll pray it is just a phase, a short one, and you will all be back on a "normal" schedule soon. Oh and with the bed time, does she take naps during the day? If so, try skipping the naps unless she falls asleep on her own. Then by bedtime she should be really really tired and go to sleep immediately. Sam quit taking naps when she was 2 and if she does now once in a while I make sure she's up by a certain time so she will be tired again by bedtime. Hope this helps!
yikes! sounds like she's got a very strong will for you to put her back in her bed at night and her to scream. We went to a parenting seminar and this is a very common thing parents asked the speaker, actually. The speaker had great advice and talked about using consequences later to get your child to understand that going to sleep without a fight is about obedience. She said one thing you could do is start taking away things that matter to her. So if she likes playing with her toys then the next day say, "You know last night you really gave mommy and daddy a fight to go to sleep and we need you to obey us, so until you can start going to sleep in your own bed without fighting us then we're just going to have to take away some of your toys." Then just continue taking them away each day until she starts obeying. This can be anything, though. The more she likes it, the bigger the cost. the other thing she talked about was just letting her cry it out...I know you said you've tried that. My opinion is that since she's 2 years old she knows exactly what she's doing. The speaker told some parents that you just let them go as long as it'll take. If she screams for an hour and you get her even though she hasn't stopped then she will continue. She wants to win the battle. The next time she could scream for 2 hours because she wants you to come. But every time you go and get her she recognizes that she can make enough fuss to win the battle. So I would just let her cry all night if you have to....as long as you know there's nothing wrong. If she cries all night then she'll eventually get tired and realize that it's not going to work anymore. That's my advice! Hope it helps!
Is she in a crib? I have a few friends with the same problem. The resolution, surprisingly enough, was moving to a toddler bed. It takes a few nights of constantly taking her back to her bed, but once she understands that she isn't allowed to get up, she might sleep better. Then, trying lying with her in HER room. That is an easier habit to break. That also reenforces the rule that she doesn't leave her bed.
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